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SheBoss, brought to you by Flourish, chats with one of the most energetic, fun-loving, lover of words and even bigger lover of Jesus, J’Que Ellis. J’Que is North Alabama’s People’s Choice Entrepreneur of the Year, Impact Speaker and Young Progressive Black Caucus Outstanding Women of Leadership Award Recipient. She’s also a fitness professional, multi-media proprietor, personal trainer, actress, Radio and Television personality, brand manager, super producer, national wellness influencer, professional model, healthy living specialist, and serial entrepreneur. Whew! Bottom line: this woman kicks major butt. This chat centers around her journey in business, life as a Mom, how she helps people on a daily basis and so much more.
She Boss with Jque Ellis
Megan: Hey guys, welcome to another episode of She Boss. I am your host, Megan and I hope you guys are doing well. Before we get started today, I just wanted to tell you a little bit about She Boss, our company, Flourish is a woman-owned small business here in Huntsville, Alabama. And we have had the absolute honor of having an opportunity to meet, collaborate and just hang with some of the coolest women who are making amazing strides here in North Alabama. And they’re just total badasses. And so we really wanted to figure out a way to just highlight them and promote them and talk about all the good things that they’re doing. But then also to- if you are a woman who’s looking or thinking about starting a business, we want you to listen to these interviews, because these women are doing amazing things. And they’ve had some super big challenges, but they’ve also overcome them. And so we thought maybe having these interviews would allow you just to get a peek behind the scenes about what fuel some of these women to do what they do.
And I think that there is one woman who stands out amidst the passion that we all strive for on a regular basis, her energy level is through the roof. I don’t know how she does what she does, but I was just telling her that whatever she has for breakfast every morning, I need to get some of it. So I would love to introduce our chat today with Jque Ellis, who’s joining us. And she is phenomenal. And when I think about looking at her background, it goes on and on. So I’m just going to throw out a couple of things that Jque does, but she is a fitness professional. She’s a personal trainer an actress, a radio and TV personality, brand manager, super producer, national wellness influencer, and so much more. So she is awesome. I’ve had such a pleasure getting to know her over the past couple of weeks and want to know a lot more about her, but I thought she would be a perfect person to chat with today. So Jque, thank you so much for chatting with me and spending some time I really do appreciate it. And let’s just jump right in. And tell us a little bit about you and your background and what sort of gets you is keeping you busy these days.
Jque: Well, howdy folks, this is your girl, Jque. Megan, thank you so much for having me on the She Boss, and to be honest with you what fuels my passion and what gets me up in the morning is Jesus, girl. And I mean that that’s real. I am a real Jesus freak down in my heart, situations and life and just being able to overcome all the things that I have overcome with Jesus is what fuels my passion. Early in life, I was not sure what I wanted to do, I have changed my career and my life story over and over and over again, which is why I’ve done so many things. But I also know that I was created for greatness, I was created to influence and impact people on so many different levels. And so the things that fuel my passion are the ability for me to be able to do that I’m what on whatever platform or playing field or whatever ground that God leads me to. I’m going in it with one hundred thousand percent and in hopes to build people up.
Megan: That is awesome. That is awesome. So you’ve obviously had this calling in a way right where you’ve recognized that you were meant to do great things? So was there a turning point in your life where that sort of light bulb went off? Or have you always felt that way? I mean, what has led you down that path?
Jque: I have not always felt that way. I have not always felt that way. I struggled a lot with confidence and self-worthiness. Early in my adult years, I had a child young. After a divorce, I was a single mom and that was when the season of unworthiness and self-confidence and all that kind of stuff just kind of took over me. And then something happened when my daughter was eight years old. And it just like the light bulb went off in my head and was like girl, “What is your issue? You have a daughter; you have a child that you have to set the example for that you have to guide. This is your responsibility”. And I’ve come from a God fearing and a Jesus foundation home. My mother is a pastor. My dad is a deacon, I played music. I was church leader, evangelist and all that even growing up, but life hits you hard when you become an adult and you have to start ‘adulting’ right and so, just through the ‘adulting’ season and transferring from childhood, teenager, and young adult to real full-fledged adult with responsibilities. A light bulb went off in my head and it wasn’t until my daughter was eight years old that it started happening for me. And being a single parent does a lot for pushing you to do what you have to do. Because you got to make sure that your kid can thrive, you got to make sure you got a roof over your head, you got to make sure that you can eat and survive and make sure that you provide an environment for your child that is sufficient. And me, I’ve always been one of those people who want more, who’ve always wanted more. And so when I first started making my transition into worthy life, wanting more didn’t happen for myself, but God used my child to teach me how to want more, because I wanted more for her. And in the midst of trying to make that happen, and manifesting that more and that worthy, confident life for my child, it happened for me, too and the discovery of me and the discovery of the greatness within me started happening. And then honey, it just went from there hundred percent, full-fledge.
Megan: That is awesome. It’s amazing too. I think we talked and I had an opportunity to meet you when we chatted, you know, on with Intune with email, which was awesome. And we have kind of similar stories in that regard, where my daughter too, was sort of the anchor for what pushed things and after divorce, and being a single mom of kids and I got laid off my job. And so I was left with sort of, like, “what do I do?” And there was no option to fail. Like, that’s not even an option, right? Especially because you have to set this good example for your kids and just like you and it was like light bulb moment went off, and it was like you cannot fail, it’s not an option, you’ve got to move forward. And by the way, you also need to set a good example to show your kids that nothing can tear you down because if you do, then they may accept that as a course of action, which is just not acceptable.
Jque: They think it’s normal. I see, and I noticed it with myself, I speak about my own experiences because I’ve learned about life more through my own experiences than I have watching other people. I’m an introvert in real life. So most of the time you see me behind the scenes, and I’m always taking photos of myself and what I’m doing, but it’s not always with crowds of people or with people. And so setting the example for myself meant that I had to look in the mirror, I literally had to dissect my own self, I had to look in the mirror at who Jque was, and put sticky notes and post it notes on the pros and cons of, if my daughter was looking at me or a young girl was looking at me somewhere, what would be the pros and cons of what she would see, and how she wants to live that life or what she could take from that in order to be a better person. Dissecting yourself is hard girl. But when you do it, and I’m still doing it, I’m constantly dissecting myself in life. And once you do it, though, it helps you to see yourself in a clearer picture. And it also helps to navigate you through the roadmap of what you want to be, how you want your characteristics to be developed, how you want others to see you and most importantly, for me, to make sure that I’m on the right path and living out the destiny that I know God has called on my life.
Megan: Yeah, so take us through like, I’m just curious, from a practical standpoint, take us through what that looks like for you. Do you wake up every morning and you’re looking in the mirror and you’re like, “Let’s go girl”, and you just sort of like run through some things about that day, especially now, we are all in quarantine with COVID-19. And so our lives have been completely changed and have been shaken and everybody’s normal is no longer right. Hopefully, we will be back to somewhat normalcy in the next couple of weeks. But what does that look like for you? What do you what are your day to day routines that you implement that really help you stay on top of your game in that way?
Jque: Well, I wake up at the bed, I get on my knees and I pray I find that getting on my knees and subjecting myself and surrendering my day to God before I start helps me. And then after that, I go into straight organization logistics mode. Your girl is a planner. And when I say a planner, I live my life by post it notes and calendars on my wall and on my mirrors and not just one of my mirrors, the one in my bedroom, the one in my bathroom and the one right in front of my door as I go out into my garage. From that, I’m an organizational junkie. If I hadn’t planned it and it’s not in the calendar, it probably won’t get done until all the other things that are on the schedule or on the list for the day have been completed. And that’s how I stay afloat? You know, I’m a planner, I’m very logistically driven. My day starts with meditation. I also start with self-care. Three things that I start my day with are; Jesus, organization and self-care. And self-care is a multitude of things. Self-care is not just the physical things that I do for myself, but they’re the mental things that I do for myself as even all the way down to planning, understanding what the plan is going to do, making sure I know what the accomplishments are going to be. I want to know the roadmap of how I’m going to do this, that and the other, checking things off the list. Accountability is huge for me, accountability is huge for me. So I have developed the habit of not doing too much. And I used to think that I was a multi tasker, and understanding my personality. I can handle doing several things at one time, but I do not do them all in the same time at the same time. So I might have fifteen things on my list today. But I designate specific times to do those fifteen things so that I can complete them all.
Megan: That’s interesting. So how do you how do you go through prioritizing things? Because I mean, you have your hands dipped in so many different areas. So when you look through that list, I mean, I think prioritizing things; time management organization, I mean, just as being a mom alone is really hard. And I mean, I think I’m guilty of it. And in talking with a lot of moms, I know they’re guilty of it, too, where and I love to hear you say that self-care is the top of the list, because that’s normally something that comes way after everybody else is taken care of. It’s like you take care of all those other things and then you come back around, you’re like, “hey, now I want to take care of myself”. And at that point, you’re pretty much drained and you have no time. So how do you prioritize all the things that you’ve got going on for each day.
Jque: I have a four-step system for prioritizing. And it got developed just when my daughter turned eight; I had to learn to prioritize. And so it took me about ten years to figure out the system that worked best for me. But my system that I use for prioritizing when I start my day is again, I start meditation, I try to hear what God really wants me to focus on that day. And then after I know what that focus is for him and my destiny. After that, the first thing is money. If it ain’t making money, baby, it ain’t making sense. And that’s real for me. As an entrepreneur, I have to make sure that the investment of my time, my energy, my dollars, my thoughts, my soul, my passions are going to make a return for me, so that I can continue to do those things and so God first, money in return second, and then the benefit of me and my family, third. Lastly, are the people that support me, and my circle, I’ve got to make sure that it’s positively impacting and influencing them. And those are my top things of priority in that order in real life. Because again, if I don’t, then you’re right, I do a lot of things, and I would never get anything done. And nothing would ever be a benefit if I didn’t have a system of prioritization. And so that’s what works for me. I am driven by making sure that my priorities are intact, that I’ve got a plan. I’m organized, I’m logistically on task and that God is first.
Megan: Yeah, I love that. So let’s talk a little bit about your tribe, and the people that you surround yourself with. So I’ve learned over the years that it’s funny, it’s like, the older you get, I swear, the wiser you get, and you learn things. You really do. Yeah, it’s like, “oh, you’re gonna be 40”, I am welcoming that because I think the older things just come into a clearer view. And it really helps to clean up your life a bit when you can recognize who’s good for you, who’s not good for you, who helps push you forward, who weighs you down in ways that are not worth it. So I would love to hear about your tribe and the types of people that you surround yourself with. And are you strategic about that in a way where you’re conscious of the people that you devote your time to? And what does that look like for you?
Jque: I am very conscious. I’m very strategic, and I’m very particular who I surround myself with. And I say that because people are surrounded all the time, but who I allow myself to engage in surrounding and in my circle with I am very specific about that. And I am more guided by my sense of connection than anything. And then I want those people, first of all, to have the same standards of execution. Because people can talk, people can have great ideas, people can have wonderful characteristics, but they don’t know how to use all of those resources, in order to get things done in order to execute or in order to, you know, manifest what they’re trying to do, then they’re sucking my energy. And I’m very specific about my synergistic fields. And that’s what I consider surrounding myself with people.
I do also take into play how much effort and energy I’m going to have to provide in that circle. Because I look at a circle as it is typical, it is continuing it is infinite, there are no definite lines of stop and start, and it’s a continual circle. And that’s how energy is; it’s never a stop and start on energy. And so if you’re in my circle, and I’m surrounding you, I’m including you in my circle, you’ve got to be on that same level, if not almost above me, because I need your energy, and you need my energy. And secondly, I always try to make sure I have people in my circle that are where I want to be. Because they motivate me, they keep me inspired in those times, where I’m like, “Oh, I just don’t know, if I’m cut out for this”, then boom, you know, they can drop a couple of nuggets on me refuel my tank, and then I can go and complete the mission.
And so surround yourself with people that are synergistically at the same level as you that have knowledge and power that are above and beyond you. But where you want to be is important. And then I always try to make sure that I surround myself with faith based believers. Again, my faith and my spirituality is the number one thing that fuels my passion that drives me. And so I’ve got to have those entities in my circle. And if you aren’t in that, if you don’t have those, then you can be outside of my circle, and we can still communicate and we can still exchange with each other, but you’re not going be in my circle is tight, baby it is tight, tight. Because I also believe that even though you’ve got a lot of the same characteristics, it’s not good to have everybody in your circle, we can be revolving with each other. But you can’t always just be in my circle. And so yeah, I’m a tight knit person. I’m a supporter, a cheerleader, I cheer everybody on, I want everybody in this world to succeed, to have what they want to be able to grow to live life to the fullest. That’s one of my mantras, make sure that you are living your dreams now, and live life to the fullest at every moment that the miracle of life is blessed upon you. But at the same time, I can’t be in a circle with you. But we could still hang out a little bit.
Megan: Oh, my gosh, you crack me up. I love that though because you’re very purposeful about your actions. And you’re very purposeful about the people that you open up to and you surround yourself with. And I love that because being able to benefit from relationships in ways that propel you forward is so important. And I don’t think that unless you’re conscious about it, you don’t realize sometimes how people can just be a mental and emotional drain on you sometimes. And also being aware, if you were that person, and you are behaving that way to other people and just thinking about what that does. It’s just not healthy. It’s not healthy at all.
Jque: You know, Megan, it’s good that you say that, because at some point in my life, I was a drain on other people. And again, in that form of discovery in that mirror, when I would wake up every morning and I would look at myself in the mirror and look through myself in the mirror, tried to discover who I was, that was on my list early, to make sure that I wanted to change who I was and my characteristics so that I was not the person that was in somebody’s circle, draining them out. You know, every time I went somewhere, I was the needy person and I was never able to contribute. I had to unfold and understand discover some layers and onions and onions of layers in myself to strip off so that when I was in someone else’s circle, I was not doing that to them and developing the, the characteristics or the standards, the requirements, the different things that I wanted to make sure that I included in my circle, didn’t happen overnight. It was, again, something that we discover upon ourselves. And if we’re not taking the time to discover ourselves, which is the number one thing for self-care, self-love, developing yourself, you’re never going to find those out. And you may never even know that you’re the one who’s draining the freaking circle. I actually think you’re contributing to it, and you’re the one that’s draining it. And you may not even know that you’re doing it on purpose. But until you do self-discovery, and make that a part of something that you’re actively doing in your life infinitely, and then you’re right, you would never know.
Megan: Well, and I think this is such a great point too, for women, especially as they embark on their entrepreneurial journey, and they are looking to start a business or have started a business and there’s all of this self-doubt. I mean, we are our own worst critics, you know, as you know, especially women and we are so critical of things. And so to be aware, and to be vulnerable enough to recognize them, you really have to dig deep and to your best self out there. And if you constantly doubt what it is that you’re doing, and constantly having negative thoughts around that, or whatever it might be, it’s going to be a constant barrier, no matter what. You’ve got to be able to put yourself out there.
Jque: You’ve got to be able to do it.
Megan: So let’s talk a little bit more on the business side of things. So what has you moving on a day to day basis these days? Because I know you have a variety of projects going on, but like what has you busy nowadays.
Jque: My busy day really consists of my every single day is of course my fitness business. I’m a fitness professional and I train clients every single day except for Sundays I don’t know. Now during this situation we’re in now, I’m taking clients, whatever is comfortable for them because I want them to stay motivated, I want them to stay moving and we’re just in the house. I don’t have to drive anywhere. It’s really easy for me to stay engaged. So fitness is number one. Production media is number two, Sunshine Enterprises, my media company. So number two, and then number three is wellness influencer I’m a big brand ambassador and wellness influencer meet media proprietor right now for twenty two different brands. And so I work on making sure that the audience that I influence or the audience that I speak to and impact, feel motivated, empowered, and activated to move into whatever scenario or whatever I’m subject or topic I’m speaking on, to get them to move and take action on whatever that brand is that I’m speaking on. And so those are my three main jobs that I do every day on a consistent basis.
Production is my love. It was a hobby at one time, and I’m an actress, and of course you know, radio personality, I write, I do theater. And so that came out of I used to suffer from depression and anxiety as a child. And my mother and my father said, “Oh, she’s a drama queen”. But I was again, an introvert. So I’m a drama queen all by myself. And so I started taking a few acting classes, got in theater, in high school, and even into college. And after that, I got my first main gig for a show in Vegas. And then I was a Carnival Cruise Line entertainer for four years and from that, Sunshine Enterprises, boom. And Sunshine enterprises birth, because there were so many people that I was working with in the entertainment company, in the entertainment business that had no idea of the business aspects of entertainment. So simple things like your media kit that you needed, your video resumes that you needed, how to sign up, or how to register what you needed to do for an audition and all of those kinds of things. That’s kind of how such an enterprise was birthed. Because I had so many people asking me, “Hey, Jque, how did you do this? How did you do that? How did you do this?” And so from there, it went into media and production with the television show and a few other things that I started years ago and those were birthed out of the need to make more money as a single parent, and have to be more flexible. Because as a single parent, that’s one of the biggest things I struggled with was the flexibility of being able to make money and not have to use all of it for childcare, to go make money. You have to pay a babysitter to go make the money and the extra money that I was making was to pay the babysitter, what? That was a cycle of what- I’m not getting any anything out of this. And so the hustle of starting and becoming an entrepreneur was birthed out of a wanting to be more flexible, and be able to manage my time with a bigger benefit for me and my child.
So production is really something I love to do. It’s a way of me being able to share my voice without having to worry about people’s opinions, or care if somebody likes it or doesn’t like it, because it’s me behind the camera. And then it’s up to you to decide if you want to turn it off or shut the volume down or switch channels or not listen to what I’m saying. And then I don’t have to also worry about the reactions of looking at people be like, “Oh, she didn’t like that, oh, maybe I should try something else”. So production also spawned for me out of a level of confidence. And it has definitely helped me build confidence.
Fitness came out of the fact that I was just fat. I couldn’t stand what I look like, I had diabetes, and I was wearing a diabetic pump for seven years. And again, I was trying to live a life that was an example for my kid. And so loving myself was the biggest spawn of an example of what I needed to do to show my daughter how to love herself. And loving myself meant taking better care of myself physically, doing spiritual development, doing career development, all those things that helped make me a better person. And learning to love myself, learning to love what I looked like, not having to spend all the money on diabetic care and pump and all these insurance bills. And so that’s kind of how my fitness career started. I was in the gym, working to develop myself. And over the years, I had been taking so many classes. And then one day, the girl that was doing the class, she wasn’t there. And everybody looked at me and said, “She can teach it because she’s here every day”. And I was like, “oh, okay”, so I had to come from the back of the class I got on the stage, and I taught the class and voila, I loved it. I loved watching the people smile and seeing their joy, not for me, but the joy for what they could do what they could get out of that class, motivating them to move and to feel something different about themselves, learning to love and enjoy the miracle what their body can do, how they can feel. And that’s kind of how fitness became a part of my life.
Megan: Isn’t that awesome? How it sort of was by accident, right? And then it kind of brought you into this whole this whole new phase of your life that maybe you wouldn’t even have entertained had that teacher, had been there that day. And I think that as we get older, I mean, obviously taking care of yourself and exercise and all that becomes a little bit harder. The older you get, in working with a lot of women within fitness, what are your top three pieces of advice as it relates to fitness that you give to women?
Jque: My top three piece of advice for women, the first thing I say would be to spend thirty minutes every day with yourself. And you’re doing movement, do some type of movement. We get stuck in all these things that the media puts out there about what kind of movement we have to do, baby, if it’s just walking, get your walk on, if it’s just punching a bag, punch a bag, whatever it is, spend thirty minutes with yourself doing some type of what I call intentional movement not walking from your car, not walking downstairs to go get coffee. People think also that if their job means that they got walk from door to door that that’s exercise, that’s spending time with yourself. No, that is not an intentional moment of movement for yourself and with yourself.
The second thing that I would suggest is- think about what you’re putting in your body. Think about your food. Think about the mental things, what are you reading? What are you consuming on the TV; all of those things are things that you’re putting in your body, that take a reflection, if you’re a smoker, if you’re a drinker. All the things that you’re putting into your body are going to reflect on the outside. They’re also going to be motivators and stimulators for what you feel and how you respond to yourself. So even if it’s just changing one thing a day, if you’re eating bread and you want to change that, just take one slice of bread and then fold it in half. If you’re strong enough to not do bread at all, not do bread at all. But at least make one intentional effort to change, to do better about consciously thinking about what you’re putting on the inside of your body as well.
And then, the third thing that I suggest for people is get you an accountability system. And it could be a partner. For me, it’s post it notes, you know, it could be a phone call, it could be an alarm on your phone, there’s so many resources available out there for you to be create accountability. But you don’t know what’s going to work for you until you try, right. And in trying is when you discover what works discover you, understanding more about you and what works for you. I didn’t discover that post it notes were a great accountability for me until I was forty two. So it took me almost eight years to understand that post it notes are the best accountability for me. Because again, when I look in that mirror, and I see those post it notes, they remind me they’re physical, I could take them out, okay, put them on the door, okay, take them out, go to the next thing, put them on the wall. And so that’s what I found is helped to keep me accountable, that system may not work for you but until you start trying to discover the things that work best for you. You’re never going to know.
Megan: I think that’s a really, really great point. And I love the fact that you talk about when you look at fitness as a whole and self-care, everything that goes into your body, not only food, water, alcohol, whatever it may be, but social media, what you read, what you watch, listen to I mean, I don’t think that those are probably some components that people think about when they think about self-care, honestly.
Jque: Yeah, consumption, consumption of anything, that’s why I use the word consumption. So when you’re consuming something, that means you’re taking it in, whether it’s by your mouth, by your eyes, by your ears, by your mind, everything that you consume is a reflection or an output of what’s going to manifest and motivate your efforts and your actions.
Megan: I love that. I absolutely love that. I don’t want to say it seems simple, because it’s not. But that’s like an ‘aha’ moment, I think when people really get that and understand how powerful consumption can be, and how all of that reflects on the outside of your body. And not only that, but it also takes up brain space and mental space that you could be able to put towards other things. Yeah, that’s massive. And this is just one thing among many. But we’re doing a lot of these virtual workshops right now and so we’re talking a lot about social media. If you think about how much that can consume, and what you’re watching on social media, and for a lot of people, first thing they do in the morning is check the news to see what’s going on with COVID-19. And so it’s just article after article after article of not so positive things that people are talking about that, after a while, it just it consumes you in a very draining way.
Jque: It can be draining your energy, your synergistic energy, just like I said, whatever you’re consuming. I had to have a discussion with my mom, she wakes up every day, and it’s that COVID-19 stuff. And the news is doing its job. It’s putting out the information, it’s keeping you engaged. And it’s a shame that as humans right now, we thrive on negativity, and negativity is not always a bad thing. But if that’s the only thing that we’re consuming, then it’s not driving us to do anything. But negative because negative and negative is negative. The only way you can manifest positive and plus things are to feed yourself with that. Because that’s the only way that you’re going to be able to reciprocate or to put out that same type of energy, what you pull in, and what you put in and what you consume, is what’s going to manifest and what you’re going to put out and it’s simple as that.
Megan: Yeah, that’s so true. And you have to be very conscious of that, because I think we get into these very unhealthy habits, and you don’t even realize that you’re doing it. So being very conscious of that, I think is super important. So tell me a little bit about, obviously we work with a lot of women, and we are fortunate enough to work with a lot of women who are entertaining the idea of starting a business. So you were kind of not forced to make a decision but you had a very clear pathway and what was driving you which was your daughter, and when these things that unfolded within your life that this is what you are meant to do. This is your calling, you need to move forward and sort of pursue some of those dreams and thoughts that you had if not only for you, obviously, to kind of showcase and be a good example for her. But what are some things that you would share with other women who are either entertaining the idea or just getting started really don’t know where to go any tips that you would have for some someone?
Jque: Yes. Well, if you’re just getting started or as a matter of fact still on the couch, wishing, hoping and dreaming to get started, stop it immediately. First of all, stop it. And you know, Megan the funniest thing is we can say stop it but really stopping something to start something else is probably the hardest step. It is the most fearful step, it is the most uncertain step. It requires the most faith to start something. And really, it’s not the starting, it’s to stop something, it’s to stop self-doubt, is to stop being afraid, and to just jump and do it. So the first thing I would say is, figure out how you can stop what you’re doing. So you can have the courage and the bravery to start what it is that you dreaming of.
And then when you start, the next biggest thing I say is make a plan, but make a plan to execute. A lot of us had these business plans. I know for me, I had a business plan to open up a facility for twelve years, I had a business plan to open up a facility for twelve years, I had been working as a personal trainer, Go into all these other people’s gyms, making sure all of their clients were good and I had a business plan, I paid somebody to make me a business plan. And I never took it to action. I never executed it. And so you’ve got to plan your execution and your action, secondly.
And then get you a mentor, get you someone that you can go to and say, “Okay, I’m stuck like chuck, what do I do”. I feel like too, we need to make sure that our mentors are not just somebody that’s talking to us. I need a mentor that is empowering me to activate, that can encourage me to move into action that has the tools and the resources to help me execute, not just coach me, not just talk to me about it, but gives me the synergy and the motivation and the resources and the tools in order for me to move into action, you know, to step out on that faith.
Megan: And to be accountable too
Jque: And that’s my fourth thing. Yeah, accountability, you’ve got to have a way to be accountable. Checks and balances is the biggest thing for entrepreneurship that I’ve ever had to succumb to, checks and balances. Because even now, Megan, I’ll say, “Yeah, girl, I’m going to do this”, I get off my webinar calls, I’m calling into action, all this and other. But if I didn’t have things in place, to hold me accountable for sending everybody all those spreadsheets I just talked about, guess what? I’m no benefit to all of those people that I just talked to about what I needed them to do. So I have to be accountable to the actions that I say I’m going to do, not just for myself, but for the people that are involved in the executing this plan and so yeah, accountability. Those are the four biggest things about starting anything, even though I’ve been an entrepreneur for twelve years.
Every day, I have to put those four things in action, when it comes to just even starting my day. Even if you’re not an entrepreneur for a business, just even starting your day, you have to wake up and stop lying in the bed, right? You got to stop lying in the bed and get out and start your day. So that’s the first thing. And then the next thing, you got to have a plan of action, okay? You can start your day but if you don’t know what you’re going to do with it, what are you going to accomplish? Okay, then you got to have some type of mentor for me right now my biggest mentor is God. He is what I feel like drives me to take action after I do my meditation and my prayer.
And then what holds me accountable for that is my sticky notes, my post it notes because at the end of the night when I’m closing out my day, I can check off those post it notes and put them in my done folder and I’ve got a done folder. I wish I could take you to my office and show you my post it notes whole system here and then my done folder is the cabinet and a drawer and it feels so good at the end of the month. When I get those post it notes out girl or when I’m down, and I’m feeling like God, I can’t do nothing with my life, Oh, Jesus, this is the worst day ever, I can pull out that drawer and look at the things that I’ve accomplished, or what I’ve been able to do in the past and that motivates me. And so, as a person who wants to start anything, a business, you want to have a baby, you want to get a new car, stopping and then starting, making sure that you have a plan to execute, having a mentor, and then making sure you have accountability in place. Those are the four things that are going to get you to success faster than having money for anything. Because if you need money, and you’re going to have a start stop plan of action, accountability and mentor to get the money that you need anyway.
Megan: Right, that’s such great advice, though. I mean, accountability is huge. And I don’t think people really realize how important that is. And, like you mentioned, you can talk about all of these things, but until you actually have a plan in place, and the ability to hold yourself accountable to actually achieving the results that you need and the milestones that you need to reach that end point. It’s just talk, right, and it’s just an idea, and just sort of-
Jque: Jabba Jabba Jabba like I tell my clients, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, or you send me a picture or track or number of something you did, and you said, you did it, I don’t believe it. It’s just blah, blah, blah,
Megan: Right, I love it. I love it. You have to be honest with people, you’ve got to be honest with yourself and if you can’t do that, you can be standing in your own way to have so many different things in life. And then before you know it, maybe an opportunity has passed or whatever it might be. So I love that. So if people need to get post it notes, get post it notes if you need to get those.
Jque: Get schedulers, if you need an accountability partner. Don’t pick your family. When I was discovering how to be accountable to myself, I was always trying to find people to be accountable. When you work out, people always say “Come on, do it with me, I need a partner. Come on, do it with me, I need a partner”. Humans are the most unaccountable, undependable subjects and things to use for accountability. Because think about it, we have a hard time holding our own selves accountable for something right. And so you have to find systems to be accountable. And the internet is a great place to find systems. I know that you know, some people say, Oh, well, I say go find somebody out there, look it up on the social media that has a lifestyle that you feel like you look like it wants to be, don’t try to discover anything about them. Just go on there. If you’re an Instagram junkie like me, look find on Instagram, I find people on Instagram, yes, even fitness people, even me, I need motivation and accountability for my own fitness life. I find people on their timeline where their timeline may represent a part of the accountability that I’m striving for and I connect to that, not them to that. So if it’s Instagram, oh, gosh, yeah, Debbie Do It. Debbie Do It is my accountability person right now because her timeline looks like what I want my timeline to look like. And so I go and I study that I find things that she’s doing, or I just mimic what she’s doing. Because when you do things for so long, and it’s not twenty one days, people it takes longer than that to create habits. I don’t know where that myth came from twenty one days is not a habit creating number. It’s a do something for right now number, that’s it. So, when you’re trying to find accountability, it is a discovery. But in being consistent on trying to find accountability, you discover what works for you.
Megan: Yeah, I love that. That’s a great that’s a really great tip. And I think even just like you mentioned, plugging things into your phone, making it a regular thing where you’re sitting down with yourself, whether it be on Sunday evenings to kind of plan out your week and kind of go through and check off the things that you’ve done what you haven’t done. But I love the fact though, too, that you mentioned don’t make your accountability partner, someone who was potentially biased towards you, like a family member or something like that.
Jque: Yeah, none of my best friends are my accountability partners for nothing. Take it back there my accountability partners for being, that’s it.
My daughter is my accountability partner for being my daughter. I know what she better call me and check on me, that’s what I’m holding her accountable for, being my daughter, you know what I’m saying. But you also again, got to put the right things in the right places for what they’re supposed to be used for. And more times than none, families are moms and dads and husbands are not great accountability partners for when you want to step out, stop something and start something new.
Megan: Yeah, totally agree. So Jque, I’m going to ask you just one last question before we wrap up because you have such an interesting perspective on things. And again, your energy is just so contagious. So I’m going to make sure that I start following you and doing all of your exercises and stuff like that, that you do. I mean, I’m already following you, but jump on there. Because it’s like, yes, I want to go work out with her later. But tell me a little bit about- just in general, whether it is something that is industry specific that you’re working in right now or anything else? What gets you really excited right now? Like, is there anything in particular that is just getting you fired up right now that you’re looking forward to or anything like that?
Jque: Yes, right now, I am actually working on my book. So getting fired up about finishing this book, which is a big accountability piece for me. I have been working Megan for years and years and years, on products, services, branding, and things of that nature. And a big accountability piece for me is, if I don’t have one of my own freaking. I coach people all the time, and there are many other and I don’t have a personal brand product of my own. And so going back and through and looking at the actions and the things and the desires of what I wanted to leave as far as my legacy on my life is a book. I write articles, I write blogs, I love words, when I say I love words, baby I started reading and speaking in oratorical contest, because growing up I stuttered. And so I had my tongue clipped. And I had to learn how to speak again and slow down because I was a massive stutter even now, when I get a little anxious and I get excited or nervous. I start stuttering again. And so I always wanted to write this book. So I’ve started and stopped and started and stopped and started and stopped for probably at least seven years now. So what I’m most excited about is finishing this project. That is the one accountable mission for 2020, Jque is to finish this book, and I’m excited about it. I’ve written twelve pages, girl. I set myself up to succeed by giving myself a whole twelve months to do it. Because all the other times I was trying to do it like, “okay, I can do this in a month”. And I set my goals based on what I thought I could do, because of what I can do for others. I can write a dissertation for somebody. I helped write a dissertation, a 36 page dissertation in almost an hour and a half. So, when it comes to writing and words, I’m a lover of words. But I’ll tell you where my epic fail is. I love words, and I love reading. I hate writing. I hate having to type out my thoughts. So one of my writing mentors gave me a tool, which is why it’s so important to have a tool in place. And it’s called speak to text. And literally, so now instead of sitting down and having to write the book, or type it out and do all that kind of stuff. I’m learning to set time aside weekly, to spend an hour of writing my thought for this book into an app, into an app that records those thoughts. And then once I’m completed with whatever I feel like is the finishing of the book, then I’ll go back and edit those thoughts. And that plan of action helped manifest to make me feel confident about even being able to accomplish this goal from a mentor. Which is why I say the importance of a mentor is not somebody that can just talk to me, but that can actually get me into moving and help with providing resources and things, actionable things that can actually help me get to accomplish those goals. So writing my book right now honey is that thing that I’m most driven by right now.
Megan: That is awesome. Congratulations.
Jque: Thank you.
Megan: That’s a big deal. I I cannot wait to see when that comes out.
Jque: Me either.
Megan: That’s awesome. That is such a huge life accomplishment to be able to even take that on, that is amazing. Well, and I love the fact too, that you have to find a path that works for you. So you are a lover of words and this is how you’ve always been, but you’ve had one thing that perhaps was a barrier for you, which was physically writing or typing it out. So you figure out a way around it. And that way you can make it work, based on your own time. That’s awesome. I’m so excited to hear about that. Have you picked out a name for the book yet?
Jque: I have picked up a name, but I am not sharing it yet.
Megan: I didn’t think you were. I was going to say, Oh, would you mind? Yeah, it’s too early for that. You don’t want to jinx it.
Jque: I’m not sharing it yet. And the only reason I’m not is because I am also a perfectionist. And being a super producer, some of the things that I’ve learned about myself are, I also like to operate in a spirit of excellence. And so I had to take perfection off of my plate, understanding and becoming, a more spiritual person and connecting to my divine entity, I can never be perfect, I was not built to be perfect. But God said, I can activate and I can operate in a spirit of excellent meaning that I’m giving all and I’m making sure that everything that I’m contributing to this journey is 100%, all of the time, it is at a certain standard of how I feel God is guiding me. I am making sure I’m staying in the lines of what my destiny is. And those are more of the things that I’m concentrating on now, instead of everything trying to be perfect. I’m working on making sure it’s excellent. I’m making sure that it’s what is supposed to be out there. And until I get that confirmation that it is complete, that God deems it as excellent. And that it is according to the guidelines of what he said, for me in this purpose of this book. I will not share it until then.
Megan: I love that. That reminds me, we were at an event a couple of months ago, one of the speakers said something along the lines of you can absolutely have it all, as a mom, as a business owner, as a wife, as a spouse, whatever. But you just have to be realistic about what that ‘all’ means and redefine that to fit your life, which is very similar to that, right? It’s not about being perfect. It’s not about looking like someone else that. You can’t compare yourself to other people because you are the only you.
Jque: You are unique.
Megan: Yeah, you have to define what those expectations are, and make sure that they’re realistic for yourself, which I think is so important. I love that. I love that.
Jque: Girl, you know it’s so funny that you said that because I had to present for a bloggers’ conference recently. And that was what my presentation was on. As a blogger, one of the things you have to separate and do for yourself and how you stand out is being the unique you that you were set out to be your words, your thoughts, and transpiring, and translating those into the atmosphere are unique. And so in order to be able to influence or be a blogger, or be someone that impacts another person with your words, you have to be able to translate what those words mean and the only way you can do that is to define who you are in those terms. You are absolutely right about that, yeah, defining who you are. And that comes from knowing yourself trying different things in order to discover who you are and stopping in order to start.
Megan: Yeah, I love that which ties right back into your self-reflection and self-care and all of that so I love that. I could talk to you for hours Jque, you are so motivating, oh my gosh.
Jque: Thank you, girl.
Megan: We all need a little Jque in our life.
Jque: Hey, it’s the God in me, I promise you it’s not me because every morning I have to get up and I have to go through that and I have to look at myself. I have to discover myself every single day and make sure that I’m staying true to that. And I think everybody needs to do that making sure that you stay true to yourself at every moment that God is blessing us debris. We got to stay true.
Megan: Yeah, well it can be taken away in a heartbeat You No. And so I mean, you have to just like that. So I love it so much. And thank you so much for chatting with me today and where can people find you? How can people follow you on social media?
Jque: Okay, if you guys want to connect with me, you can connect me on all platforms, social media, Gmail, website, call me up, look me up at Jque now.
Megan: That’s awesome. And we’ll make sure to include some of your links to in the video description for this. So thank you so much. I really do appreciate it, can’t wait to see you again soon. And I’m going to be holding you accountable next time I chat with you. I’m going to see how many pages you’ve gotten above that 12 page count.
Jque: It’s going down because every single week, it’s a time that I set aside. So by the end of this year, the book is going to be out and I’m going to let you know me like, “Megan you need to get on my website girl and get that book, it’s only $22 go on and get it chick”.
Megan: You better believe that we will be there. There is no doubt.
Jque: Yes ma’am. I so appreciate you for having me on this platform, as well as all that you’re doing to shine the light on all the women out here that are bossing up because it’s not easy to be a boss. It’s not easy to be out here bossing up. And it’s not easy to continue to stay a boss on a daily basis. So I appreciate you ladies for shining the light and sharing everybody’s journey because being a boss is different for different folks it’s different strokes. So I appreciate you.
Megan: That’s right. You got to do an end interview. Thank you so much. You’re so sweet. And so thank you so much. And we’ll have to do a follow up with you in a couple months’ time and see how things are going.
Jque: Okay
Megan: Alright, lady, have a good one
Jque: Love you
Megan: Alright, you take care already.