Megan: Thank you, guys, so much for tuning in today. I am honored to be joined with Paula Steele with WellStone which is a local facility we’re going to talk a lot about today. But I’m just thrilled that you’re here. So, thank you so much for carving out time on this rainy day to make it over here.
Megan: Absolutely. Paula has been someone who our professional circles have crossed recently which I’m greatly appreciative about. We’re not going to talk about that necessarily today, but you’ve been with WellStone for quite some time here in Huntsville. WellStone is such a phenomenal mental health facility that is helping children and adults and all in between with services as a community health agency community mental health agency, I should say and just doing phenomenal things here in our community.
Megan: So, we’re going to talk a little bit about her background. Military background a little bit and has moved around a bit but I will say just a little disclaimer. I think that’s probably the first one that we’ve given, but there may be some pretty sensitive topics that we talk about today that might be a little bit hard regarding potential suicide and trauma and things of that nature.
Megan: I’m not going to go into it too much, but those topics will certainly be covered because that’s the nature of the world that you live in. Yeah. It takes a very special person to do that. So, I’m eager for this conversation to hear your story, but just wanted to let, some folks know that we may.
Megan: We may talk about some of those things. Anyways, thank you so much for being here. I do appreciate it. And let’s just start at the beginning. I know a little about your background, what you studied, where you’re from, and all of that, but let’s start there, and then we’ll work our way up to where you are today.
Paula: Okay I felt called into this career field, but it was bumps and hurdles along the way. My husband and I, who’s retired military, enlisted straight out of college, and then We were all over the place. So, we went to college together. I got my undergraduate degree in psychology and entered the field briefly, and then we were all over the world. So went back to get my master’s in social work. Later in life. So, I was a graduate with a newborn and two older kids, and my husband was deployed at the time. So, trying to make all that work and juggle all those responsibilities did you sleep at all during that time frame or was it very minimal?
Paula: I kept telling myself you just got to get through this and then you’re good to go but it was every day. You’ve got that mantra going on. Yes. Yeah. Yes, but I think you see how A group of women can come together and support each other during that time. And that is exactly what happened.
Paula: All the military spouses that were around me rallied and helped me get through that.
Megan: Yeah, it truly takes a tribe, right?
Paula: It does.
Megan: I’ve heard that a couple of times was just in the military community. My sister’s part of the firefighter community with her husband and it’s very similar to that where everybody just rallies around each other.
Megan: So, what, if I can ask you a little bit about your beginning, what intrigued you initially to go into psychology, and then how did you make the Not the leap necessarily, but how did you determine that you wanted to pursue your master’s in social work after traveling?
Paula: So, I was fascinated with the way our brain works. And that’s what led me into psychology in the beginning., I aspired to go into direct practice getting my doctorate in psychology. I think life experience, because there was that break in time before I pursued my master’s, and living all over the world in different cultures and meeting so many amazing people, but amazing people that had barriers they were facing led me to social work, because social work looks at not just the individual, but every system that impacts the individual that might keep them from being successful.
Paula: And in today’s world, there are so many different barriers that individuals face. So that felt more holistic to me.
Megan: Yeah. Did you get a lot of direct exposure from that, from your husband being in the military or was that through personal family relationships, if I can ask? Or,
Paula: I would say a little bit of both. I don’t think that there, It’s probably any family that mental health or substance use doesn’t touch in some way, But the same with the military there’s trauma experienced by our military active duty and veterans But also their families and their children And I was part of our care team that would assist if a soldier was injured or killed and when they were deployed.
Paula: So, it was heavy and eye-opening but also, I think, helped me to know that was the path that I needed to go down.
Megan: Wow. I know we’ll talk about this a little bit down the road, but you just piqued my interest in something. You, from your experience when you’ve seen trauma especially within, someone who has served in the military. Do you often find that, and I feel like this is a no-brainer question, but I’m curious, do you find that sort of trickle down into that family dynamic and potentially, create an environment where additional challenges within mental health become the reality. Is that something that you’ve seen?
Paula: When a service member comes back from a deployment. They have pretty much been on the go. Their stress level is high. They’re constantly in a state of fight or flight. And so, it’s hard to do that switch when you come back home and integrate with your family. And all of a sudden there are all these routines and there are all of these, events that you have to go to where I can think of one time my husband, in particular, came home and we had to go to an event and it was in a gymnasium which echoed and there were just people everywhere and he was just constantly scanning and really could not enjoy that time and could not calm himself enough to be in that kind of chaotic environment where it’s so uncontrolled.
Megan: That’s got to be so hard. And so, the implications that have then on maybe your kids or just your family dynamic is that you guys are all maybe reacting to that a little bit and helping to shield some of that concern of it.
Paula: There are so many different things. And when you think about the one spouse leaving and the other spouse being back, trying to take care of the young kids or older kids, they’re the ones that are making all the decisions. They’re, they’ve developed their own routine and then suddenly you have the other spouse come back and that can be a hard transition for the young person. Suddenly there are different roles or a different change in their routine. And it can really unsettle the whole family.
Megan: Yeah. I could see that causing a lot of disruption, that you just must adapt to and get used to, which is really hard. So, flash forward, you complete your master’s degree, which is amazing. Talk about a hustler, being able to do that while your husband is deployed and you’ve got little kids and holy cow, just managing all that. What are some of the things that kind of kept you going in all of that? And I’d be curious with the master’s in social degree, in social work at that time in your life, what were you wanting to achieve with that? What was your goal for that?
Paula: My end goal was always, I thought in my head, the military was my family. I wanted to work with the VA work with soldiers with their families. That was my experience. That was really where I thought I was being led. And it’s funny how then you end up somewhere else and you realize, okay, maybe something else is in store.
Megan: Yeah. That’s exciting.
Paula: Yeah.
Megan: So, flash forward, you’ve been at Wellstone since 2017 and have overseen several huge initiatives while being there – with the new building opening a couple of years ago. And then most recently the new pediatric unit, which is amazing. And for those who don’t know, you guys received a grant a couple of years ago from Governor Ivy, right? One of the three grants in the state to open its first community mental health facility. So, talk a little bit about that and really what. Were you there prior to, and then during, and after, and got to see all of it come to fruition? Or, were you part of that team when that announcement was already there? Or, just talk a little bit about what that meant.
Paula: So, I think WellStone was instrumental in bringing crisis services to Alabama. And Jeremy Blair, our CEO, has really worked so hard. So, years and years before 2020 when those three crisis centers were awarded, he had worked diligently on that. However, I did get to play a role in the development of our request for program, RFP. So, we, anyone who wanted to try to receive one of these crisis centers had to submit one.
Paula: So, I got to help with that. I got to help some with the building design. That’s fun. But when we were awarded it, I had not been chosen as the director at that time. But I was bound and determined that was going to be my program. I just believed so much in what this could change for mental health.
Paula: Just really be a transformative experience for individuals that, nowhere else to go besides the emergency room or sometimes ending up in jail. Yeah. When they’re in crisis the way we approach it is holistic, looking at the whole person, which just aligns with the social work values.
Paula: I just knew I needed to be a part of this.
Megan: Yeah. That’s amazing. So, what, for those that maybe don’t know what a crisis center is compared to Not to be silly, but the emergency room, right? If someone is experiencing a true crisis what is typically their course of action? And now that this crisis center is here, how has that changed that?
Megan: And too, I’d be curious, why now, what was the need? What, what has unfolded? And I know we can all make our own assumptions about this, right? But we’d love to hear it from you. Why was Alabama and North Alabama primarily chosen for this specifically? And how has that really made such an impact on our community?
Paula: I think at the state level, when you’re looking at the services available and access to care, there was no immediate access to care to mental health or substance use services. There was a long, drawn-out process to get your initial appointment and then get in to see a psychiatrist.
Paula: Or you would go to the emergency room where mental health is important, and I can’t take away from that, but if there’s a trauma victim who comes in or someone who’s been in a car wreck, those individuals get prioritized. And so, you might be sitting in the emergency room for a while before you’re seen.
Paula: And Madison County, in particular, we didn’t really have a huge number of psychiatric beds. Available as compared to some of the other places in Alabama that really had a built-up system. So, I think it was overall a recognition that we didn’t have the right kind of services in place that people needed.
Paula: And after so many things were going on in our world and over time some services had been defunded. And then different orientations of how we should provide services for mental health. But I think even at the national level, there was a recognition that mental health has got to be prioritized.
Paula: Yeah. We had we have so many people dying from opioid overdose daily. It’s just unreal.
Megan: can’t believe that it’s still happening. It is I just, you hear obviously the UK doesn’t come out of the news, but I feel like it’s been, I don’t know why, but when I think of an epidemic, I think of a short term thing and I feel like this has been going on for an extended period of time, which is just, it’s just wild to me and it’s heartbreaking.
Megan: Absolutely. It is.
Paula: And I think oftentimes people don’t realize that whatever recreational drug they’re using is laced with fentanyl or some other concoction until they end up in the hospital or unfortunately, they lose their life. So, I think the crisis centers came about because we saw there was a gap, but also nationwide we needed a crisis system of care, which for everyone, best practices show we need someone to call, someone to respond, and somewhere to go.
Paula: Okay. So that is our nationwide crisis system of care, of calling 988 having options for someone to respond which best practices show is a mobile crisis team, and then having somewhere to go, which is a crisis center.
Megan: Okay. Do you guys, is there a mobile crisis team here as well?
Paula: We do.
Megan: Let’s talk about that a little bit.
Paula: Okay. So, under WellStone Emergency Services, we have, of course, our Adult Crisis Center and our Pediatric Crisis Center. And then, we have an adult mobile crisis team, which is a master-level therapist and a care manager that responds to someone in crisis for Huntsville. It’s anywhere in Madison County.
Paula: So, if the crisis is at the gas station on the corner, that’s where they go. If it’s at Publix, they show up at Publix. It’s just wherever that crisis is. They work in conjunction with our law enforcement to stabilize individuals where they are, provide resources, or bring them to the crisis center if that’s the level of care that they need.
Paula: Wow. So, we also have a child and adolescent mobile crisis team. That responds to young people who are in crisis, wherever they may be in Madison County. Wow.
Megan: So how many patients would you guys say that you’re serving on an annual basis now, especially with the pediatric unit? I don’t know if that’s, do you have those stats yet?
Megan: I know it recently opened, but what are you guys thinking? So
Paula: We moved on the adult side, we moved into our new building in October of 2022. Okay. We were averaging around 40 admissions a month. Now we’re up to between 150 and 170 admissions a month on the adult side. Our pediatric unit we opened on September 30th, and we’ve had over 50 admissions so far.
Paula: Wow.
Megan: That’s wild. That is wild. So, I would love to talk a little bit about the pediatric side of it. As a mother of three kids, I know you have kids as well, and I’ve read so many articles on the mental health crisis. and its association with technology and social media and all of the things, it’s just goes on and on and it is really hard to wrap your head around as a parent to know what you do, like how do you handle it and it was crazy, I was just at a theater performance at my son’s high school last night, like last night and was speaking with a friend of his who talked we somehow got, I know.
Megan: It was in the program and there was a recognition in the program that was about calling 9 8 8. And it was in honor of a student who took his own life years ago. And they still put it in this program to this day. And I didn’t know what it was because I just didn’t know. And so, I was sitting there talking with her about it, and she’s a young 16-year-old girl.
Megan: And she opened up about just her own personal challenges with mental health and it’s, and I know that, and even speaking with my own kids, it’s a very common thing. So I would just be curious to hear from your perspective What sort of shift have you seen throughout your career not to make this doom and gloom, but where are we headed, as it relates to this, and how can we as parents and as neighbors and as family, step in and play a role to help combat that.
Megan: I know, and again, I know there’s some of these things that you’re not necessarily an expert in, but you’ve been exposed to so much and I’ve been involved in this space for a long time. What’s your kind of consensus of the whole thing? I know that’s a big, loaded question, but,
Paula: I think that we really must pay attention to the impact of electronic screen time and social media on our young people.
Paula: The Surgeon General even put out a warning about it. We’re seeing kids who are ages 12 to 14, I think is the statistic. The second leading cause of death is suicide. Yeah. That, as a mom, makes my stomach drop. Yeah, a hundred percent. Yeah. When I was a kid, a long time ago when people were talking bad about you at school or someone was being bullied, it was like maybe on the bus ride there between the hours of school and on the bus ride home.
Paula: Now it’s 24/7 because it’s social media, it’s text messaging, it’s nonstop. And I think there is the problem that something that you would never say to someone face to face seems easy to say it via text. A hundred percent. Yeah. Where you’re not making eye contact with the person when you’re saying this thing.
Megan: And it’s amazing because I think, even I’ve seen You know, some of the things like my son is doing and, like you see what other kids are saying. And I’m like, would you ever say that to somebody’s face? And it’s no. And it’s then why in the world would you think it’s okay to say it over text?
Megan: And to your point, it’s, there’s no immediate penalty. There are no repercussions to that. You know what I’m saying? And it’s just very dangerous area to play in.
Paula: And I think one of the other challenges as a parent is technology is advancing so quickly. Yeah. Yeah. And. There are so many different apps that just pop up overnight that allow kids to hide them on their phone or they can even get you to take away a young person’s phone.
Paula: They can get another phone at school. No problem. It’s hard to monitor. It’s hard to know for myself. A lot of times my 12-year-old. how to do something on my phone that I just can’t grab. So, to think about trying to really monitor who they’re meeting online, what experiences they’re having.
Paula: It’s difficult.
Megan: Agreed.
Megan: I will say I think I don’t know if it’s called a brick or a bark phone It’s one of the two, we’ve talked about it. We had Kristen Scroggins in with Gen Y communications I’m not sure if you’re familiar with her, but she specializes in diverse and generational diversity. And she, I could listen to her talk all day long.
Megan: She’s fascinating and she’s hysterical to boot. But she talks a lot about that. And we had a big conversation about that. And, as a parent looking back like never in a million years would I put a smartphone in my kid’s hand ever. And, and she made this good point, which, you hear but sometimes hearing it in another setting just hits differently, but she said, I’m, I am not here to be their best friend.
Megan: I’m here to parent them and make sure that they are protected in all aspects until they turn 18 and they go decide to be an adult, and I think, we often, at least I also only speak for myself, but you get guilted into certain things because you feel bad, right? They won’t fit in if they don’t have this or have that, but. Oh my gosh, it’s such a slippery slope in what those yields. That is so hard to monitor. My oldest daughter was telling me the same thing. She’s look on his phone, he can hide it. So it might be, look, it might be looked like, disguises this or that. And I’m like, I would never even think to do that, which is just wild.
Megan: But so, what’s, so talk to us a little bit about. Maybe you’re sitting with a 14-year-old girl, right? And are there particular signs that you would suggest keeping an eye out? Are there things that you guys are seeing from a WellStone perspective that not necessarily making a generalized consensus, but are trends that are new and frankly scary, that you’re seeing?
Megan: What are some of those things
Paula: that come to mind? Self-harm, self-mutilation. is very rampant and a lot of times it’s in places on the body that you would not normally see. Yeah. And I think also, parents just don’t realize exactly how much screen time people are having, their young people are having.
Paula: There are ways to, to check. I don’t think people just normally know to do that. That, to see and even knowing how to shut off all the Wi Fi in the house. Or asking, like feeling empowered enough to meet the parents of other kids. Or to ask your neighbor to, not let them, not let your child on their Wi Fi.
Paula: Because they can get it in their room. So, there’s a lot, I think there is too many individuals that are coming in that are feeling suicidal. And too many too many people don’t realize that It’s an okay conversation to have and you need to practice. You need to be able to sit down with your child and say that word suicidal.
Megan: Yeah.
Paula: Not, are you thinking about hurting yourself? Because that can mean many things.
Paula: But, are you planning to end your life? Are you thinking about suicide? I think many people feel you use that word, and it puts that thought in their head. That’s not true. I think it must be an open space and a safe space to have those conversations.
Paula: And normalize talking about emotions.
Megan: Yeah,
Paula: so important.
Megan: Then that way you can figure out how to handle them the right way. This is thanks to your colleague, Karen Peterson. Yes. Give her a shout out. She’s amazing. She is. The last time we saw you, she was, couldn’t stop talking about Rising Strong, the book that she’s reading by Brene Brown.
Megan: And I’m a huge Brene Brown fan. She’s just amazing. Everything that comes out of her mouth is just liquid gold, in my opinion. And I’m like, I wish I had you like in my ear when I was a kid. But she talks a lot about being able to, especially with your kids talk openly about emotion and how important it is to even use that word, use the descriptors, and let kids know that it’s okay to share that I’m angry right now, or I’m sad about this or whatever it might be.
Megan: Because it’s ill. There are so many benefits as to why, but one of the big ones is that way you can have them. Coping mechanisms, you can figure out the way you can handle a situation and be able to contain it a little bit, but I think you’re so right. You’ve got to have that dialogue with your kids, which is just so
Paula: critical.
Paula: It is. And I always say, I wish in school, that was one of the curricula is learning those coping skills, learning how to manage your emotions. I don’t think we’re preparing our kids to face the kind of challenges that they are. And be willing to understand those big emotions that they’re feeling.
Paula: But also understand that there’s help there for them.
Megan: Yeah. Yeah.
Paula: And empowering them to reach out. Yeah.
Megan: How have you guys if you have an opinion on this, what’s your perception on the on stigma, frankly. And is that, are we subsiding from thinking there’s a stigma there when we talk about mental health?
Megan: There’s been so much open dialogue, even from a, from the top down within our country, talking about the importance of mental health, but I still feel like there’s a barrier there. And so, talk a little bit about that and what you’ve seen.
Paula: I think there are some cultural barriers to it.
Paula: And I think that must be a continued conversation. And for individuals that are working in mental health to really recognize that and encourage and provide encouragement. But I also think surprisingly, our young people are more open to discussion about mental health. Sometimes they don’t want to talk about that, but maybe the parents or the grandparents are still stuck.
Megan: Yeah.
Paula: We don’t talk about our business. outside of the house. Or thinking that’s shameful or not taking it seriously enough when a young person comes to talk with them. Yeah.
Megan: Yeah. I saw this video the other day that kind of reminds me of that a little bit where it was a woman about my age and, mid-forties and she was in essence oversimplifying, but talking about, generational trauma and, how.
Megan: for trauma to go, not necessarily undiagnosed, but untreated. And then that carries over into the next generation. And it just has this kind of rippling effect, how that impacts a family, and how that impacts their trajectory in life and their ability to succeed financially and all these different things.
Megan: It’s insane to me. But she simplified it and she’s My mom and dad wouldn’t even think about going to therapy. It wasn’t even a question of it, at all. Her generation, my generation we’re leaning into it for sure. And that, and people are Going to see therapists openly talking about it and the generation beneath me.
Megan: That’s like the number one thing they talk about, and so to think about hopefully this sort of transformational shift unfolding where we’re out of that Mindset of we can’t talk about it, right? And if we do there’s something wrong with you and therefore it care, you know It just lingers with you in ways that frankly can impact your professional careers and all sorts of different things But I’m really hoping that we’re on the same Trajectory for change in that regard and it seems to be a lot more of a vocal topic nowadays than it has been which is Good, I just hope that trend continues.
Paula: I do too. There’s an impactful study called adverse childhood experiences It’s like an it’s a simple test that you can take and the higher number of experiences those really traumatic ones The worse your long-term outcomes are unless you get treatment. And we’re talking about shorter life expectancy.
Paula: The higher rates of mental health and substance use, poor job performance or ability to get good jobs serious medical conditions, the list goes on and on. So really thinking that out, in each person’s space without going to get treatment. The outcomes can be so bad.
Megan: So bad, yeah. And we’ve not to get into it too heavily, but working with a local company here who’s developed a blood screening that helps you just another tool in your toolbox, right?
Megan: But expresses, that’s based here in Huntsville, they’ve developed a TII screening that allows you to identify potential changes in your genetic makeup that could be caused by trauma which, causes you to be more prone to long term illness, such as inflammation and all sorts of different things.
Megan: To have that kind of working knowledge going in when you decide to take that step and seek therapy or seek counsel is such a huge benefit. mountain to overcome. But also, to something that I think would give a practitioner or direct primary care provider, just way more insight into the scenario that they’re working with.
Megan: So, I would love for you to just talk a little bit, not specifically about I Express, but a little bit around the association of trauma and long-term mental health a little bit. And I’ll only speak on behalf of myself, but I think I represent a good, portion of the population potentially who has experienced some sort of trauma in their life, whether it be sexual trauma or physical trauma or emotional trauma for that matter.
Megan: And I, like many other women and men are just like, Oh, it’s no big deal. It’s no big deal. It’s fine. It’s fine. It’s fine. And I’ve got a good friend in my corner who’s always telling me that it’s not fine. And in fact, you need to face things head on and really deal with that. Those things manifest in other ways throughout our lifetime that we may not even realize.
Megan: So, I would love to just get your opinion on that aspect of things. And it’s not necessarily to say that, hey, everybody who has experienced trauma in our life needs to seek this. But the reality is that your body changes when you are constantly in that fight or flight state, as you mentioned earlier, and that’s not how our bodies are supposed to be regulated which, which alters, how we’re able to handle certain situations.
Megan: The other thing I will say about that and then I would love your opinion on it is that trauma. I think when a lot of people think about one experiencing trauma, it’s a devastating single event. Whether it be, again, a sexual assault or you were hijacked or you were, had the death of a child or something like that, that, whatever it might be.
Megan: Traumatic events can be long term and where your body is constantly in that fight or fight because you’re dealing with a stress that frankly is overwhelming, right? And I don’t think a lot of people realize that and how that can have long term effects on your body too, so just talk a little bit about that aspect of things.
Paula: So, I think there sometimes is a misconception that, mental health is separate from our physical health. And it is, that’s so wrong. So wrong. So incredibly wrong. That trauma response in our body, which really is activated by that fight or flight where tons of hormones are released throughout your body, cortisol, for example, which is a stress hormone.
Paula: And it’s like your body’s like preparing itself to fight, right? So, it’s taking blood away from your vital organs to, to other areas so that you can run if you need to, or you can fight back. But when your bodies in a constant state like that, it’s really tearing your body down.
Paula: And so, thinking about that and kind of practice is a lot of times we develop skills to help us handle that, but they’re not good skills, drinking to numb at all, taking drugs to feel happy. Which is causing other bad impacts on your body. So, as a practitioner, you’re looking at, okay, we have trauma that we need to address, but we also have to learn new coping skills but even recognize the damage that we’re doing with those skills that we learned just to try to make it through.
Paula: Yeah. Yeah. But when you think about, going back to the generational trauma I spoke with someone recently a man of color who is living in the South and really those micro traumas that happen every single day, where you walk into a store and people are following you to make sure you’re not going to take anything.
Paula: Now keep in mind, this is an amazing young man, but still it’s, yeah, but that is his experience every single day. That adds up over time. Because you, your body can’t relax. Your body is always looking ready to defend you because you’re not safe. You’re not feeling safe. So, there’s so many types of self-care that people have to do.
Paula: The people that have severe trauma and trauma over time, they must work through that. Because it does have long term consequences. Even my staff are experiencing the trauma of others vicariously. Which is Burnout being such a real thing. I
Megan: could only imagine, especially, as you were mentioning earlier, that you guys are in essence a 24/7 unit.
Megan: Yeah. There’s no off button for the services that you provide. I could not even imagine being that the day-to-day. And then you’re, and I know we talked, you mentioned this earlier, but. The challenge that you face too is your own self-care.
Paula: Oh yeah.
Megan: Which is just so it’s like you’re seeing it and you’re preaching it and you’re helping to instill it, but man, have you got to take a conscious effort to just stop and pause and breathe occasionally, which I would imagine is way easier said than done, but yeah.
Megan: So how does, how do your employees handle that and how does WellStone address that? Yeah,
Paula: I think at least in our program; we really must be a team. willing to admit, okay, this is, I’m feeling overwhelmed and tag out. It can be tough, and it seems like at times there was waves of individuals that need help that have been through so much.
Paula: And it, it’s just almost everyone on the unit is discouraged or, just so overwhelmed with the terrible experiences that people are going through and the barriers that they’re facing when they leave us. Yeah. Even though we can help them while they’re here with us, they might be having to go back to a homeless camp or going back to a place where they don’t have anyone that loves them and supports them.
Paula: Yeah.
Megan: Going back to an environment where they’re with the person who is causing that fight or fight, right? Yeah. If you’re an abusive relationship or, I couldn’t even imagine that.
Paula: Yeah. Those times are tough, and I think we, we are very intentional about celebrating the successes and celebrating even when people make just a little incremental gain.
Paula: Sometimes that’s the biggest deal out of the day. But we, but I do have to be mindful that this can just be so overwhelming for those that are in place to help others.
Megan: I can imagine that. So, what would you say, coming from your perspective, what are some sort of, and I don’t mean generalized, the importance of them, but like general tips that one can do to stay on top of those types of things.
Megan: And again, like whether you have a history of some traumatic trauma in your life where you don’t what sort of that like mental cleanup, if you will, I think of like the restocking stuff, right? What are some of the things that, individuals can just do on a regular basis, almost to check in with themselves?
Megan: In a way, sometimes you must think about your thinking. Yeah. And I know that sounds weird, but no, it doesn’t sound weird.
Paula: You really like examining your thoughts and if all your thoughts during the day are tilted towards the negative. Or, you can’t experience things that you used to really enjoy.
Paula: You’re not seeing the joy in. everyday little experiences anymore. Something’s probably wrong. Your cup’s probably empty. Yeah. But I think it’s also important to know what works for you what’s going to recharge your engine, what’s going to fill your cup back up. And it’s going to be different for everybody.
Paula: Yeah. But when you are feeling so overwhelmed and There’s no downtime for you. There’s no, your brain just won’t stop. You’re probably needing to take some time and recharge.
Megan: Yeah. What would you say some of the common things that you do to refill your cup?
Paula: What works for you? For me?
Megan: Yeah.
Paula: A brain dump.
Megan: Okay. Like you get it out on paper?
Paula: I do. Or do you voice it? Yeah. Sometimes I find myself, I have so many responsibilities. And I recognize, oh my, I’m forgetting about this that or the other. So just every little thought that comes in my mind, I’m going to give myself 10 minutes at the end of work before I walk out of the building.
Paula: Okay. Just going to write it all down. Not like journal, not like journaling, just like bullets, short little sentences. Things that I’m worried about, things that I need to think more about, something I want to get to. And then I give myself permission to leave that right there on my desk. Until the next day.
Paula: When I come back into work, that’s got to be hard to It is, yeah. To leave things behind. I would imagine. It is. But part of that technique is then if it comes back up, reminding yourself, Paula, you wrote that down. Are you going to talk, are you going to think about that tomorrow? Yeah. And then really being in the moment is tough.
Paula: We’re all so tied to these dang phones. But setting it down. Yeah. And just. Experiencing where you’re at if you’re outside in nature, which is one of my favorite things Making sure that you put that phone away because it’s too tempting to take pictures. Yeah, and then Check your text messages, or, whatever. It’s a slippery slope.
Megan: For sure. Yeah, for sure. That’s good. I think it’s; I love the, are you a fan of journaling? Have you gotten into journaling at all or do you
Paula: I like creative journaling with all the different pen colors that, it’s just like my thing. I love it.
Megan: I love that
Megan: I’ve, and you can tell you have that creative side to you. Like I could see that. Journaling has been something that was introduced to me not that long ago. And I always used to write when I was younger, but I didn’t intentionally journal where I was prompting myself to ask those questions and to pay attention to your thinking.
Megan: Just like you said, I love that. Because it’s easy for us just to get in this vicious cycle especially of the dialogue that’s happening in your own mind. And I think it’s easy to just. You almost tone it out, but it’s still happening, and you just get so used to it, I think that you don’t even realize it, and journaling has been such a huge help for me.
Megan: I’ve shared that with a lot of people or just, how is your head space today and what’s on your mind and what’s, and I find that just getting things out of my head too and on paper really helps. We work closely here at Flourish with Rachel Sullivan, who’s with.
Megan: Solid Ground Counseling Center and she does a lot of mental health workshops for our team, and it’s been phenomenal to work with and she’s really helped us decipher like okay what is this voice saying versus what this voice is saying? And how do you decipher the difference between whether it’s this or it’s that or and just giving you the tools a little bit to understand You know where the mind is at and how you handle it, but it’s just a fascinating thing But I think that’s important. You’ve got to make time for yourself and give yourself permission to really slow down. And especially as, being a mom and being a working mom and even back when you were getting your master’s degree and caring for the home by yourself and all these things, it’s a really hard thing to do.
Megan: And I think Probably naturally as women we put guilt on ourselves for taking a break. We do. Because it’s like why in the world would you think to do that when the dishwasher needs to be emptied
Paula: I mean you must be super mom, right? And everybody on Facebook has the most beautiful house and the most beautiful family and everybody’s dressed perfectly.
Paula: So, there’s a lot of guilt. Which is so not reality. Yeah, it’s not. So, I think giving yourself permission to say I’m exhausted I’m not doing those dishes right now. And then it’s going to be just fine.
Megan: Like they’re not going
Paula: anywhere. The world is not going to end.
Megan: It’s hard to do that though.
Megan: It’s hard. And I think that that comparison is something that I think is just, will be the death of you. It just, it really is.
Megan: I just had a couple of stats here which just blew my mind, but it said nearly half of American teenagers report being online constantly.
Megan: Almost, nearly half, with platforms like Snapchat being the most frequent live, or frequent, frequented. And then social media usage within high school students is linked, obviously, to poorer mental health outcomes. 41 percent of teens with the highest use rate their mental health as poor or very poor. So almost half of high school students who consume social media are saying that their mental health is either poor or very poor.
Paula: Yeah.
Megan: Which is just if you don’t need a bigger stack, it’s like it’s right there. It is. It is right there. So not to bring it full circle a little bit, but as parents, we have a responsibility, right? And I, it’s, and I’m, trust me, I’m in the same boat where it’s so hard. It is so hard.
Megan: And it’s even harder once you institute something and then you try to pull it back. It’s who watch out for that. There’s a lot of pushbacks. A lot of pushbacks. And, my husband and I are constantly in discussion around we don’t understand how we can’t have greater control over a smart device.
Megan: It’s just not designed that way. It’s not. Regardless of what kind of plan you have, I mean it’s, which is why I loved Kirsten’s suggestion where get a completely different phone altogether. It still looks like a smart phone, but it’s not. Anyways, it’s just, but it makes it hard.
Megan: Really hard. It is. And kids will tell little white lies and then those white lies become comfortable to tell, and they don’t get caught and so that just becomes the norm and before you know it, you think everything is cool and then it’s not, and it’s just really scary.
Paula: It is. And it’s challenging because a lot of times that is their social experience, is texting with their friends or playing a game with their friends and. Where we used to like, have sleepovers and you knew their kids more. Yeah, we’re getting away from that more and their interaction is all on digital.
Megan: Yeah.
Paula: Yeah, which is just crazy.
Megan: We just need to get them out in sports and take the phones away. Yeah. Yeah. So, what’s next for you and the team at WellStone? I know you guys have just recently, the Pediatric Center was just recently opened which is Absolutely beautiful. Congratulations.
Megan: Thank you. What a huge endeavor that is. So, talk a little bit about that and what’s next for you guys at WellStone?
Paula: We’re so excited to bring this pediatric unit. We’re helping kids 12 to 18 right now. Who are in crisis and that looks different for every young person who needs us.
Paula: All the way from, suicidal thoughts a lot. Self-harm all the way up to the first episode of having severe mental health psychosis. But I think again it’s trying to make this that transformative experience. Our medical director talks about it, that you’re learning about mental health without realizing you are.
Paula: Cause we’re going to try to make it a fun experience and a relaxed and but most of all that they feel safe while they’re with us. Yeah. Really invested in making sure that all my staff employees who are amazing, by the way. But we’re building that culture where we’re so happy to see someone walk in the door because first, they were really brave to do that because that’s a scary thing.
Paula: 100%. To me, it’s always humbling when someone is willing to talk to me about things that are hard to talk about, but I want my staff to show that care and that love towards people because sometimes we’re all they have and sometimes this is the only opportunity if we get it wrong, they might not seek help again.
Paula: Yeah. I think we’re really invested in making sure we do this right and do it with love and with care but also, of course, with all the evidence-based practices that we need to try to help. Yeah, the individuals get better.
Megan: Yeah, that’s so exciting. So, for will you guys be providing I’m sure there – you guys do a great job of education.
Megan: That’s a big piece of it, right? But to parents in this area to know that facility is available to them
Paula: Yeah, you
Megan: know So when would be the time to call WellStone for crisis support as it relates to their child?
Paula: Any question whatsoever if you have a question, just call someone’s going to speak with you nine eight If you’re calling from a 2 5 6 area code, that’s a WellStone therapist, that’s the answer on the phone.
Paula: 24 7, someone’s available? That’s awesome. I say err on the side of caution. Yeah. Just call and ask. And we’re willing to be there to help.
Megan: Yeah.
Paula: 988 can launch our mobile crisis teams. Get help to you that you need. And our crisis center is 24 seven. Yeah.
Megan: And not to put down any hospital, hospitals in our area, but you guys are better equipped to handle scenarios like that.
Megan: When you think that there is a mental health crisis there, would you say?
Paula: I think you can get in quicker course. If you’re really needing hospitalization for a young person no other beds in Madison County. So, you’re having to leave the county and send your child sometimes great distances away.
Paula: Sometimes even out of state. So, for us to be able to provide that and keep the family, which is their support system closer to them so they can be a part of treatment, I think is the best.
Megan: That is huge. That way you can be there for them. Yeah, that’s a big deal. Big deal. Congratulations. What an amazing thing to have here in our own backyard to take advantage of.
Megan: Yeah. It’s, I would love to say that I hope I never see you there, but I’m glad that it’s here. Because of just those moments that are going to happen. You know what I mean? And we, I’m so glad to see that our community is invested in that resource. It’s just awesome.
Paula: And me being a mom, I was like. I can’t believe we don’t have beds for our kids here. It’s insane. I don’t know that a lot of people are even aware of that.
Megan: That’s mind-boggling to me. So now we’ve got a resource here to help with that, which is just amazing. So, Paula, thank you so much for sharing your story and talking a little bit about what you’re doing at WellStone and what a phenomenal organization here that we’re just so grateful to have in our community.
Megan: And it’s growing with our community, and I’m so glad to see that the hires up higher-ups are recognizing that and really putting their money where we need it. So, we just look forward to everything that you guys will be taking, being involved in over the next couple of years and we’ll be cheering you on from the sidelines.
Paula: Thank you. Thank you for having me.
Megan: Of course. You’re welcome. See you guys next time.